Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Mom doesn't read my blog

Dad did, and would email me about the posts he particularly liked.  Dad was pretty forward leaning for an Old Guy Professor.  He said that when he wrote with a pen, he wrote a word at a time.  When he changed to a typewriter, he wrote a sentence at a time.  And when he switched to a word processor, he wrote a paragraph at a time.  His output of scholarly works showed this to be a true fact.

Mom doesn't spend much time online, and so she hadn't seen many of my posts (yeah, yeah, her and six Billion other people ...).  But we talked about Dad tonight, and I told her that writing about it had made it easier for me.  That all the comments that all y'all left had made it easier.

Show me, she said.  And so I did.  It was great - maybe we've  both been working past the most cutting part of the grief, each in our own way.  But joining these different ways gave us a new opportunity to talk about it, and explore his life.  At the end, we both felt better.

Joy shared is multiplied; grief shared is divided.

And a quick note to Bluesun, who left this comment to this post:
All I can say is

be glad of the times you had,


don't forget your mom.
Your advice wasn't needed, but it was exceptionally useful.  When she let inertia get in the way of coming to visit, I thought on your post, and insisted.  It's been a blessing.  Thank you, my friend.

Life is good, when you're with family.  Sometimes life is particularly good.  This is one of those times, made possible my the miracle if the blogosphere.


bluesun said...

You're welcome, and thank you, too.

When my dad died and I went back to away to school, I started calling my mother every day, for her sanity more than mine. Even just a minute to say good morning. People would sometimes try to look askance at me, but I'd just think, "When your mom is suddenly home alone and 700 miles away, I'll care what you think."

Family is most important.

Dave H said...

It sounds like you and your mother are coming to terms with the new normal. I'm glad she was able to find the energy to overcome her reluctance and join you.

For as much as I rant about people on the 'Net, I still have to admit that some of the kindest people I've ever known are here too.

Although your Mom doesn't spend much time online, I'll recommend Widownet as a great place for those whose spouses have gone away. They're good people there (although there are a few crazies - it's the Internet after all) but they understand because they're dealing with the same thing.

CoolChange©© said...

And you are making more cherished memories. I admit my eyesight got a little blurry for a second.

Mom's are so special.

ain't for city gals said...

Hi..I came over from Home On The Range when she mentioned your year anniversary of your dad's passing. I too had written about my dad's illness and death and the blog love was amazing and after it was all said and done I shared with my mom all the posts and comments. She was absolutely amazed of the love that was given from people who never knew dad except from my posts. I told it was the other way was the love dad had given them. Our dad's keep on giving...never forget that...