Dad joke CCXV - special BBQ edition

What kind of grill does a spider BBQ on?

A Weber.

Pulled Pork AAR

So yesterday I smoked a pork butt.  It came out really well but I thought I'd follow up.

One weirdness was the probe thermometer seemed to get stuck at 133 degrees.  After an hour without any increase in temperature I got the meat thermometer which showed 145 - 150.  So I finished using that which meant a lot of opening the grill.

Another weirdness was that the temperature stopped going up after 6 or 7 hours.  This may have been because the weather clouded over and the outside temperature dropped.  I double wrapped the pork in foil and finished it in the oven at 300 degrees.

It had a nice dark bark which was nicely but not overly smoky.  It was nice and juicy (thank you, Mr. Brine!).  I now have a bunch of containers that are in the freezer.  All in all, it was a good experience.  You would only do it on a lazy summer day when you have 8 hours to mess around with things, but it was as good BBQ as I've had down here in Florida.  Winning!

Red Rooster Carry Out - Damascus, MD

This place is (as they say in New England) wicked local. While they have sandwiches, and BBQ chicken is king. $2.99 for two pieces of dark meat. They also have dinners which include fries, cole slaw, and a biscuit.

It was $12 for one dinner, 2 extra pieces of chicken, and two drinks. Everything tastes great.

Probably that's why they've been here since 1971. Recommended.

Here's your chance to drunk dial Stephen Hawking

Reddit has an Ask Me Anything for the most famous physicist of our day.  Go ahead and ask him - pork or beef for BBQ?

And the title refers to this, of course:

Pig roast

I need to start going to some BBQ festivals on the motorcycle, maybe meeting up with buddies on motorcycles (*cough* Uncle Jay *cough*).


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Hawtie Hogs

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New Riders of the Purple Sage - Dim Lights, Thick Smoke (And loud, Loud Music)

Today is the Atlanta BBQ Festival.  Expect pictures later.  But this begs the question - is there a Country Music song about BBQ?  If you're wondering, you must be new here ...

A hotbed of country music in the late 1960s was - perhaps surprisingly - the San Francisco of Haight Ashbury.  Gram Parsons had perhaps the greatest long term impact, but The Grateful Dead's Jerry Garcia joined with some friends to form the New Riders of the Purple Sage (a country band named after the Zane Grey novel).  It was pretty straight up western swing classics with a solar system of orbiting friends from Big Brother And The Holding Company to Country Joe And The Fish.

This is an old Flatt & Scruggs song, played out of the smoke of San Francisco Beat bars.  It was a groovy scene, dig?  Err, with steel guitars.  You might think that the smoke in the song might have been something other than BBQ; I couldn't possibly comment.

Quite frankly, this sort of creative recombination and synthesis is precisely why we beat the Godless Commies in the Cold War.  Really.



Dim Lights, Thick Smoke (And loud, Loud Music) (Songwriters: Joe Maphis, Rose Lee Maphis, Max Fidler)

Dim lights, thick smoke, and loud, loud music
Is the only kind of life you'll ever understand
Dim lights, thick smoke and loud, loud music
You'll never make a wife to a home-loving man

A home and little children mean nothing to you
A house filled with love and a husband so true
You'd rather have a drink with the first guy you meet
And the only home you'll know is the club down the street

Dim lights, thick smoke, and loud, loud music
Is the only kind of life you'll ever understand
Dim lights, thick smoke and loud, loud music
You'll never make a wife to a home-loving man

A drinking and dancing to a honky tonk band
Is the only kind of life you'll ever understand
Go out and have your fun, you think you've played it smart
I'm sorry for you and your honky tonk heart

Dim lights, thick smoke, and loud, loud music
Is the only kind of life you'll ever understand
Dim lights, thick smoke and loud, loud music
You'll never make a wife to a home-loving man

I'd get some of this

PETA BBQ sauce:

The description is pretty righteous:

From the Chile Pepper Republic comes another sauce for People for the Eating of Tasty Animals. Where's the beef ...and the veal, pork, and chicken too? And don't forget the whale, dolphin, baby seal, and panda. Loving all God's creatures next to my potatoes.

Tasty mockery, right there.

Playing tourist

The nice thing about people visiting from out of town is that you can show them around the place.  The Texas state Capitol was more interesting that I'd expected:  We had a very funny (but no-nonsense) Texas lady as a guide.  I pity anyone who tries to invade Austin - she'll put a hurt on them.

Because Texas is part of the United States of America (as opposed to barbarous Blue States), I could have carried there.  Didn't.  Yeah, I know.

We also went to the Botanical Gardens, where the Iris are spectacular:

The weather has been quite odd - cloudy and gloomy ever since she got here.  Today was glorious.  Oh, did I mention that the Iris are spectacular?

Along the way we got BBQ from the Salt Lick (darn good BBQ).  And made pizza.  I may see if she wants to go shooting, even.  She's mentioned being nervous being at home all by herself since Dad died, and even hasn't dismissed out of hand the idea of a .22 revolver.  But her memory is noticeably worse than a year ago, so that'll take some thinking on.

It's BBQ for dinner

I've heard about Memphis style, and Carolina style, and even Texas Brisket.  But I hadn't known there is Russian-style BBQ:



Well, FPS Russia* style BBQ.  Easy on that kerosene based sauce there, Tovarisch*.

* He's not a real Russian, his name is Kyle.  But he has 250,000,000 page views on Youtube, and does this for a living.  Gun manufacturers  send him guns to shoot on his videos.  I'm guessing that JayG and Robb could do something funnier.  Hey Robb, Youtube is "pants Optional"!

** That's Russian for "Bubba".

BBQ Review - The Salt Lick

Photo credit: Borepatch

The Salt Lick has the reputation as offering some of the finest BBQ in the Austin area.  A wag might point out that it had better, since it's kind of in the middle of nowhere (Driftwood, TX).  Well, Nowhere is worth the drive.

It's a family run business which has expanded and expanded since the 1960s  Originally just the smoke pit, they soon added a porch for dining.  Catering followed, and they now have a vineyard.  While I didn't try the wine, I suspect that more people come for the BBQ and end up drinking the wine than the other way around.

It's Texas style BBQ, which means Brisket and Sausage, along with pork ribs and chicken.  Their sauce is mustard based which is different but very good - not sweet and not sour, it's a different experience but all around delicious.

I got the "burned" Brisket - the charred outside bits.  While drier, they have a maximum smokiness which I particularly like.  The pink smoke ring is highly visible - as you can see from the picture, this is the real BBQ deal.

The smoked sausage is good, but I suspect that when the novelty wears off, I'll just go for the brisket.  Same with the ribs - nothing wrong with them, but they make me think of Carolina style port ribs, which I prefer.

Their potatoes are probably the best I've ever had at a BBQ joint.  More like German potato salad, only not as tangy, but with a smoky hint.  I suspect that their sauce is involved, and adding more sauce just amped the flavor up.  Boy, they were good.

The Cole slaw was superior - no mayo in the dressing, but what seemed more like a vinaigrette.  I particularly liked it because it was hot today and this was a lot lighter than your typical cole slaw.

The BBQ beans were "meh", but I tend not to like them very much anyway.  Even with extra sauce, they were meh.

If you go - and you should - bring cash.  They don't take credit cards or checks.  There is an ATM there, but it dings you for $2.50.  Forewarned is forearmed.

All in all, worth the journey.  A little pricey - a bit under $40 for #1 Son and me for a plate and an iced tea each.  But the portions are generous, and we have cold brisket in the fridge for dinner now.  Win.

Stand by for incomming transmission ...

I tried some of this barbarous "brisket" of which you speak.  It was good (it was from Rudy's).

I guess you can keep on eating it, then ....

In other strange news of the weird, it seems that the water circles the drain backwards west of the Mississippi.

The Battle for Camp Borepatch

It's over.  At the end of next month, we will take possession of Camp Borepatch, complete with Secure Perimeter and Arms Room.  The
battlenegotiations were fierce, but have been brought to a satisfactory conclusion.

I believe that Gen. Patton would have approved.  L'audace, l'audace, toujours l'audace.  While we will not be in snooty East Cobb, we will be within 2 miles of the all time greatest BBQ restaurant on the planet, Swallow in the Hollow.*  Admittedly, it isn't Le Poulet Grand, but it's not a KFC, either ...

I had said that we might be gone from Yankeeland before the first snow.  That's looking quite likely.

This is another time to ask if anyone in the north Atlanta burbs has a gun store they really like, and trust, and like to do repeat business with, please email or leave a comment.  It appears that I will have an Arms Room to fill, and like doing business with people worth doing business with.  And #2 Son will be in desperate need of a Ruger 10/22.

* Those left behind in Yankeeland can do pretty well at Tennesee's BBQ in Framingham (and a few other locations).

Restaurant Review: Red, Hot, & Blue, Laurel MD

I'm getting my Bob on with a Barbecue review, but #1 Son suggested it, and it was our favorite BBQ joint when we lived in Maryland. Since we're rolling through on a road trip, we hit it for dinner. The first thing you'll notice is that this violates the First Law of good BBQ: it's not served to you in a building that's already been condemned. Red Hot & Blue is in a nice brick building on Main street in Laurel.


Inside is quite nice, with an enormous amount of Blues paraphernalia taking up pretty much each square inch of wall space. Some of the posters offer up some tasty nostalgia:


But de gustibus, right? I had the pulled pork sandwich, with cole slaw and hush puppies. The sandwich was decent enough, although a bit dry. The squeeze bottle of BBQ sauce was not your run of the mill sauce, and had enough of a spicy bite to stand out from the crowd. The hush puppies seemed entirely uniform, so they were probably not hand made. Oniony and deep fried got the thumbs up from #1 Son, though.

We had a good waitress, attentive but not hovering over us, keeping our iced tea/lemonade drinks topped off. The staff really bustles there, and the food comes quickly.


All in all, a decent dinner, although a bit pricy when compared to BBQ joints outside the Metro area. Using Bob's scale, I'd rate it 3 out of 5:

average; reasonably good food, moderate effort by staff/management. We'll eat there again if we happen to be in the area and craving BBQ, but have no reason to make a special trip for it.

Interestingly, this was our favorite BBQ joint back in the mid-90's. In our wanderings since then, we've run across better BBQ. But if you're in Laurel MD and have the hankering for some Q, this will fill the bill nicely.