RALEIGH, NC—A coalition of geologists are challenging the way we look at global stone reserves, claiming that, unless smarter methods of preservation are developed, mankind will eventually run out of rocks.All of you with granite counter tops, I hope you're happy. As a penance, you'd better support the proposed Rock Offset Tax (ROT) being mooted by the IPCC. A few extra bucks from all you environmental wreckers is a small price to pay so that future generations and developing nations can get their fair share of rocks.
"If we do not stop using them up at our current rate, rocks as we know them will be a thing of the past," renowned geologist Henry Kaiser said at a press conference Tuesday.
The scientists warned that, although people have long considered the world's rock supply to be inexhaustible, it has not created a significant number of new rocks since the planet cooled some 3.5 billion years ago. Moreover, the earth's rocks have been very slowly depleting in the last century due to growing demand for fireplace mantels, rock gardens, gravel, and paperweights.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Scientists: We're doomed
I mean, the science is settled and everything: