Saturday, December 26, 2009

Tim McGraw - Live Like You Were Dying

Dad's cancer is back.

I'm afraid that I've been willful, and lived my life filled with anger. I went for years without speaking with him, for foolish, prideful reasons. There's a Country song for that, but it's a bitter sort of solace.

Dad beat it the first time, ten years ago. He beat it a second time, nine months ago. I hope he'll do it again. Tenacity saw him through then, and I hope that well hasn't run dry.

I'm also glad that my Christmas present is to fly out and visit him.

The words of Stephen Levine keep returning to me, a beacon marking the channel safe from the shoals of Foolish Pride:
If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say?

And why are you waiting?
Words for all of us. I'm glad that I buried my foolish, foolish pride, and made that call. It won't erase the past, but it give us the present. An opportunity.

Live like you were dying, like every day were a gift. What would you do with it?



Live Like You Were Dying (Songwriter: Tim Nichols, Craig Wiseman)
He said: "I was in my early forties,
"With a lot of life before me,
"An' a moment came that stopped me on a dime.
"I spent most of the next days,
"Looking at the x-rays,
"An' talking 'bout the options an' talkin’ ‘bout sweet time."
I asked him when it sank in,
That this might really be the real end?
How’s it hit you when you get that kind of news?
Man whatcha do?

An' he said: "I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
"And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
"And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,
"To live like you were dyin'."

He said "I was finally the husband,
"That most the time I wasn’t.
"An' I became a friend a friend would like to have.
"And all of a sudden goin' fishin’,
"Wasn’t such an imposition,
"And I went three times that year I lost my Dad.
"Well, I finally read the Good Book,
"And I took a good long hard look,
"At what I'd do if I could do it all again,
"And then:

"I went sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
"And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
"And I gave forgiveness I'd been denying."
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,
"To live like you were dyin'."

Like tomorrow was a gift,
And you got eternity,
To think about what you’d do with it.
An' what did you do with it?
An' what can I do with it?
An' what would I do with it?

"Sky diving, I went rocky mountain climbing,
"I went two point seven seconds on a bull named Fu Man Chu.
"And then I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter,
"And I watched Blue Eagle as it was flyin'."
An' he said: "Some day, I hope you get the chance,
"To live like you were dyin'."

"To live like you were dyin'."
"To live like you were dyin'."
"To live like you were dyin'."
"To live like you were dyin'."
Why are you waiting?

11 comments:

Paladin said...

My thoughts are with you, and your Dad. My own Father had prostate Cancer many years ago (20+). He's been clean ever since, but the potential for its return is always lurking in the back of all our minds.

Hang in there.

JD said...

Sorry to hear it BP. Will be praying for you and him! I lost my Dad and Dad in law to different cancers. It is a hard road. Be strong and enjoy the time you have with him!

David said...

Thinking of you and your Dad. And good on you for doing the right thing. Remember, yesterday was history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift - that's why they call it the "present."

Have a great visit with your Dad!

soulful sepulcher said...

I'm glad you will get to have this time with your Dad, that moment when you are together is all that matters.

Buck said...

Our prayers are with you.

Anonymous said...

I really hope the news is good for your dad.

Jim

"Zack" said...

Will be praying for all of you.

doubletrouble said...

The Mrs. & I are sending good thoughts for you & your family.

kahr40 said...

BP I lost my suddenly Dad in '80 and never got a chance to say goodbye. I hope you Dad gets past the cancer a third time. I also hope you and he can enjoy whatever time ya'll have left. That is my prayer.

Borepatch said...

Thank you, everyone. More than I can say.

Wild Ed said...

I have been sitting up with my wife and her mother through the holidays. They called the family together this morning but she had decided to wait awhile longer. She is on a bipac and can hardly breathe. Is is a struggle just to watch. My prayer is that they all recover if not that they go swiftly and gently. My thoughts are with you my friend. Ed