Unexpected

We all form our preconceived ideas of men of whom we have heard a great deal, and I had certain definite notions as to the appearance and character of General Grant, but I was never so completely surprised in all my life as when I met him and found him a different person, so entirely different from my idea of him. His spare figure, simple manners, lack of all ostentation, extreme politeness, and charm of conversation were a revelation to me, for I had pictured him as a man of a directly opposite type of character, and expected to find in him only the bluntness of a soldier. Notwithstanding the fact that he talks so well, it is plain he has more brains than tongue. He is one of the most remarkable men I have ever met. He does not seem to be aware of his powers.

Alexander Stephens, Vice President of the Confederacy,
on meeting General Grant near the end of the Civil War

Some things are not as they seem. Brigid looks deep into the well of the human experience, and asks what are we, and how would someone tell?

We too often judge by the obvious, the loud, the flashy. Myself, if you saw me in line at the grocery, you would see a pretty, well fed and curvy "farm girl" in work pants, with a bag from Midway or Sears, not Gucci. Someone's Mom. Someone's older sister. You might notice the hair or the eyes, or the curve of the hip, but you would likely dismiss me as ordinary. You would not see that inner strength which could handle a load that would have sent most women and many men, packing. You would not see past the outer human form, one who has learned daily how fragile life can be; how tough, in violence, in loss, we are capable of being. Not the bones and the flesh, for they are transient, but the heart that drives those bones and that flesh into life. Fragile bones of unbreakable will.

Some rise to the occasion of greatness, against all expectation. Some fail to rise to greatness, again, sometimes against all expectation. Conventional wisdom is nothing if not conventional.

Unconventional wisdom - now that's not common.

If lives were traded for a day, that quiet and unassuming man in the worn, faded but clean overalls at the feed store might be able to command an army ...

Some are never given the chance to seize greatness. Some are given the chance, and succeed. Some are given the chance, and some fail. Some regret the chance they never got; some regret the chance they took, but lost. The worst regret is the chance that was passed, when it was offered.

Preconceived notions. They save us from having to make the effort of engaging our imagination, of breaking free of the conventional.