Thursday, April 3, 2014

An open letter to the Allmighty

Sir -

I write as a previously satisfied customer, one who considers himself to have had a long-term and very satisfactory relationship with Your establishment.  It saddens me to have to write with news of a recent decline in the product of Your heretofore excellent organization.  I hope that bringing this to Your attention will allow You to rectify this to our mutual satisfaction, as I hope to continue our past relationship in future.

In particular, I regret to point out that while I have always had a very good experience with Your establishment, recent events with my son have not been as satisfactory.  No doubt this is no fault of your employees or business plan, but I must confess that it has caused no inconsiderable inconvenience in my household.

I must stress that I am a loyal repeat customer, most recently yesterday evening when You caused my path to cross in a most enjoyable way with fellow blogger and security Guru JP.  Deep discussions were held, as you are without doubt aware.


And indeed, Sir, I must compliment You on the quality of the spirits, which were entirely satisfactory and quite frankly reflective of our past experiences.  I must say that I hope that in future my son will experience similar service from Your organization.  In fact, I was hopeful that this would occur, based on conversations with Your Son.  If You would give this matter some due consideration, I would be most grateful indeed.

I remain, Sir, Your most humble and obedient servant,
Borepatch

Postscript: I believe, Sir, that You have already had previous correspondence on this matter,. c. f. James 5:7-11.

Post postscript: kthanksbai

5 comments:

Peter said...

If Job had had access to spirits of that quality, his patience might have been attained with considerably greater ease . . .

;-)

Scott_S said...

BP - any update on son? I don't talk with the big guy as often as I should but I've broken the pattern and said a few for you and yours.

Spike said...

That's as good as a prayer as any I've heard lately. Praying for your family.

Rev. Paul said...

As the Bible says, the rain falls on the just & unjust alike. It's how we respond to negative events - and how we turn to Him - that makes the difference.

May He heal your son quickly, in Jesus' name!

Tacitus said...

Well, even He has a few issues with His subcontractors and vendors...

Tacitus