Yum! That's some good unicorn!

Welcome to the barbecue of your principles, lefties!

First up is the charmingly naive thought that the Fed.Gov would work if "we could just vote in the Right People." We've all heard about how the Coast Guard won't let oil skimming ships sail because they don't have enough life preservers. There are mutterings that we turned down the offer of Dutch skimmers because of Union protection rules.

I actually don't think that last one is right. Rather, word is coming out that the dutch ships used a skimming technique that's prohibited by the EPA. How come? Because the technique results in the discharge of oily water:

The Americans don’t have spill response vessels with skimmers because their environment regulations do not allow it. With the Dutch method seawater is sucked up with the oil by the skimmer. The oil is stored in the tanker and the superfluous water is pumped overboard. But the water does contain some oil residue, and that is too much according to US environment regulations.

US regulations contradictory
Wierd Koops thinks the US approach is nonsense, because otherwise you would have to store the surplus seawater in the tanks as well.

“We say no, you have to get as much oil as possible into the storage tanks and as little water as possible. So we pump the water, which contains drops of oil, back overboard.”

US regulations are contradictory, Mr Knoops stresses. Pumping water back into the sea with oil residue is not allowed. But you are allowed to combat the spill with chemicals so that the oil dissolves in the seawater. In both cases, the dissolved oil is naturally broken down quite quickly.

So we can't suck up oily seawater to remove the oil and save the fishing industry because the Fed.Gov won't allow a (much less) oily discharge. That's some righteous government regulation right there. The Environmental Protection Agency is causing the destruction of the environment.

If only we could vote The Right People into power ...

Offered next, rotisserie-style leftie principles:

Anyway, today House Majority Leader Steny Hoyer said that middle-class tax increases will eventually be necessary to address the nation's mounting debt. Really, Mr. Hoyer? I though Pr. Obama was promising he was going to bleed the rich. I thought he was going to lift my burdens. I thought the economy now ran on unicorn farts.

...

So it really a two-fer three-fer, I'll pay more taxes now, have to work longer, and get less benefits when I'm old because the government spent money it didn't have, and doesn't have any plan for paying it's bills except to steal it from me (and you and your children and grandchildren).

Of course, anyone who's been paying attention knows that the Progressive Agenda screws the little guy, but a lot of lefties have been so full of hopenchange that they've missed this. And so, here's the way I like my unicorn prepared, via Think Geek:

Savory Unicorn & Heirloom Tomato Bruchetta Recipe

• 14 ounce can of Unicorn Meat
• 6 or 7 ripe plum tomatoes (about 1 1/2 lbs)
• 2 cloves garlic, minced
• 1 Tbsp extra virgin olive oil
• 1 teaspoon balsamic vinegar
• 6-8 fresh basil leaves, chopped.
• Salt and freshly ground black pepper to taste
• 1 baguette French bread or similar Italian bread
• 1/4 cup olive oil

  Chop the tomatoes and mix with garlic, olive oil, vinegar, salt, pepper and basil leaves. Toss well. Slice baguettes on the diagonal about 1/2" thick. Brush each slice with olive oil and add a full rounded tablespoon of Unicorn Meat, spreading over each piece. Toast in a 450 degree directly on over rock for 5-6 minutes. Do a little funky dance by yourself until it's toasted. Serve with tomato mixture and some flaming Absinthe.

Just make sure you've bought some Carbon Offsets from Rep. Hoyer before you light the Absinthe ...