Sledgehammer's Cycles

Sledgehammer's Cycles
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Saturday, December 8, 2012

Life is complicated

I'm behind in my posts for today, having wasted yesterday evening looking at assisted living centers near Camp Borepatch.  Mom's retirement community has told us that she needs more help than they're set up to give, and so we're going to have to move her.

My thought is a place near by, so that we could see her more than a couple times a year.  There are two within walking distance, so there's no shortage of options.  Older Brother is looking at places near his home as well. 

Mom is bummed out, as you'd expect.  Not only does she realize that she's losing her faculties, but she's looking about moving away from the area she and Dad chose to retire.  I'm convinced that having her close to family is critical, but expect her to be very unhappy that she can't get up to Santa Fe to visit Dad's grave.

Life is complicated.  I'll be back later.


Ruth said...

I'm glad the retirement community noticed. When my dad's mother started loosing it her's didn't. And she ended up in the hospital twice, due to missed or double taken meds, before my dad and his brother were notified that she needed more assistance than she could give. Unfortunetly by that time she needed a nursing home, and she completely deteriorated shortly after.

Bob said...

Good luck with it, Ted. Prayers being sent.

Murphy's Law said...

Been there. expect to be there again. Prayers sent.

Old NFO said...

Thoughts and prayers BP.

Mrs. S. said...

If there are any DePaul assisted living facilities in your or your mom's area, check them out. They are non-profit, and as a result really do have the residents' best interest in mind. The one where my mother-in-law is staying is very clean and they have a wonderful staff. They don't even try to have carpeting in the hallways, they do tile, because carpeting is too difficult to keep clean.

Ma-in-law refused to move back north by family because the cold weather really irritates her arthritis, so we found a place near where she lived. All her friends down there can still visit her.

All your hard work will pay off. Finding the a good place is difficult. Interviewing managers of assisted living facilities is a bit like having lots of conversations with slick used car salesmen. Good Luck!

Midwest Chick said...

My thoughts and prayers are with you. I hope you can find her someplace close to either you or your brother so you can drop in and see her often--I think long-term that will mean more to her than anything. Good luck!

agirlandhergun said...

Oh, that's hard. Praying for the perfect outcome.

Celtic Spirit said...

Having been in this situation for the last couple of years, I will tell you that having your loved one in close proximity is essential. The closer the better. Even if the facility is supervising her meds, you will have to be involved in her care and oversight on an almost daily basis. Whatever the management says, they essentially leave the care of the residents in the hands of their staff. In our case, all urban blacks. As individuals some may be competent and caring, but most are not. I wish you well.