"If you think this is the time, I'll support that decision."
His vet said that today. Crap.
I took this picture seven years ago today, when we got three feet of snow in Maryland. He made a trail through the snow for The Queen Of The World, and loved every minute.
Today when the vet said those words, TQOTW cried. She's not ready for this. I'm not ready for this. How could you be?
Wolfgang's back legs get tangled up when he walks. Sometimes he falls. It's hard for him to stand up a lot of the time. But his mind is clear, and he wants to play with his doggie friends. The other day at the local dog park when one of his friends was chasing a ball, I didn't let him play chase. He has always loved that. But I knew it would make him hurt for days. So I held his collar and didn't let him run.
He cried. That about killed me.
Today at the vet I realized that it's not that we won't have him for years (heck, y'all might not have me for that). But we might not have him for months, or maybe weeks.
I'm not ready for this. I know what's coming, and what's approaching. We won't let him suffer. But this is too soon, too soon, too damn soon.
"If you think this is the time, I'll support that decision."
28 comments:
God's comfort and blessing to you all at this time. *hugs*
I am so sorry. I met Wolfgang at your home in Georgia when traveling many years ago. I went back to the hotel covered in hair. And it was wonderful. I smiled now and then that week when I was in meetings and noticed a strand or two of hair on my pants. I am glad you let me meet him.
I remember him as a young pup, ready to run for days.
I've never been blessed with a family. Wife, children, all that eluded me my entire life. So it goes, deal and move on.
But I've been blessed with one of the finest damn dogs that ever did walk. She was beside me for 14 years, some of the best and worst times, and though it all she never wavered.
Putting her down was the hardest thing. Literally the only time I cried in near 20 years. And I bawled like a baby.
But the vet told me something that I've never forgotten: "You gave her the greatest gift of all, JB: You took away her pain."
I don't know, but maybe that can help your pain just a bit.
This is the worst part of having a dog. But it will be the greatest gift you can give him... An end to his suffering.
It is NEVER easy and it's always too soon. They grab your heart and don't let go. When they leave they take it with them. Ouch. I understand.
I'm so sorry. May the Lord comfort you and yours.
It is always too soon, but....
I made the opposite mistake: putting it off for too long. Too soon is better.
Don't think of it as "putting him down". That phrase is too cruel and should be permanently banned.
Think of it as "giving him the pain-free rest that he deserves".
He'll always be in your heart.
It's as though you've been watching my Sadie over the back fence. Your description of Wolfgang's health could mirror hers. She's reached that "here I is, and here I stays" point of her life.
None of us here want to do what we know is coming. Our prayers are with you, your family, and Wolfgang. May you find some comfort in your memories of his younger days, and may you all find some peace from this sad time.
The only thing worse than a pet's passing is the passing of a loved one. And the difference is very slim in most cases.
I am almost wordless because I've been there also. But Jeff B said it best.
"But the vet told me something that I've never forgotten: "You gave her the greatest gift of all, JB: You took away her pain."".
Love hurts, Wolfgang loved you for his whole lifetime and will be there waiting for you when you pass, to play and rejoice again.
Crying
I feel your pain but do want to echo what Igor and Unknown said. I made the same mistake that Igor did and it still haunts me. I know the tug of war in your heart, but they count on us to step up and make the pain stop. We're never ready but when the doc says they'll back your decision, he knows because he's seen it before.
Blessings to you all and to Wolfgang.
We’re very sorry for your situation BP. We too had to make that decision a number of years ago; it is truly agonizing..
Our prayers are with you, QotW, & Wolfgang.
DT
So sorry. Wolfgang has been a good boi for y'all.
I worked as a veterinary technician for many years.
I long ago came to the realization that a few days too early is better than a few hours too late.
It NEVER gets any easier no matter how many times you have to face that decision but it really is the greatest thing you can offer your best friend.
And don't leave him alone...it's not like we were ever mean to an animal but we were not their person...he'll do better if you're there.
Diane
I'm coming from a different view point. I've had to put down more than my fair share of dogs, I'm 72. Hip dysplasia, cancer, old age. As long as they are happy enough, let them live. There are pain meds available, that take the edge off, they can put up with a lot of pain, just like us. Know anybody with neck, back, joint problems? Or maybe I'm the only one with those issues.
The dog will let you know when it REALLY is time. When it IS time, then it's on me to do the deed (I'm going to be damn sure it is time), sitting on an embankment, loving them, talking to them, then a 22 to the base of the scull. No drama, no twitching, just lights out(except for me crying like I just lost my best friend). I've never had a dog that went to the vet without issues, the one time I had a vet do it, the vet came to me because of the stress on the dog and I was in a body cast.
Of course you're going to do what you think is best, go with your heart, don't do it prematurely.
We had to put down Dana, our 12-year-old German Shepherd a few months back. She'd been gimpy for several years, but was still a happy dog. Then came the blood in her poop, which rendered it black as tar. The vet said "It's either cancer or multiple organ failure." We knew that wouldn't end well, so we decided it was time. It's NEVER "the right time" for us, but I sincerely believe We unshackled Dana from her failing body that day. She's free now...
...The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away...
OMG Bro... soooooooooooo sorry. He's such a -good boy- too. Loved knowing him, even that short timeframe during our visits. Wifey's gonna be crushed to hear this. No chance of a Doggie Wheelchair? If his front is still functional? Maybe an assisted walking device? This gets me right in the feels man... so sorry.
I'm sorry. I have no words that can help, but I'm sorry as hell.
I'm with Big Country here. I've raised many German Shepherds, and one of the best had neurological issues, back legs non-functional. We got the walking wheels, and like any good bubba, I just put them on him without reading the directions. He hadn't walked in about six months, and I picked up the instructions and they said "only put it on your dog for 5 min a day until he gets used to it" I looked up, and he was 200 yards away, a-holes and elbows, fast as he could. It gave him some great moments for awhile.
Best choice is the one that feels best to you, and him.
In the time I'be been reading your blog I've lost two dogs. One of them was a German Shepherd who was about as handsome as Wofgang. I often described him as a Labrador in a German Shepherd's coat due to his gentleness and friendliness with all of us. (Except maybe cats.) This part now for you is the hardest of having a dog in your life. But, but, it still does not outweigh all that comes with having a dog in your life.
I remember when you first got Wolfgang. Clearly you have given him a wonderful life filled with wonderful people. This is the best any dog can hope for. You've done well for each other. I feel for you, for those who can do the hard things, must do them. But love will endure. God keep you and strengthen you.
I feel for you. Been there, done that, in Africa where I had to perform the dreaded deed myself on a couple of occasions.
Think not of yourself. Think of your friend and companion. Is he in pain? Discomfort? Can you help? Your own heart-ache is yours, it's Wolfgang and Wolfgang only who should enter your considerations.
We all weep at the inevitable end, but give praise for the time we had together.
He's a handsome guy! So sorry to hear of this.
My heart aches for you, having been through the loss of furry family members too many times. It really hurts. I have no words of wisdom, but will pray for peace and comfort for all of you.
I have to agree with Igor and Unknown/Diane as much as I don't want to. If your vet is saying that he would support you ,that means in his professional opinion it has reached the time. As much as you will miss Wolfgang, don't make him suffer needlessly.
My wife and I have been through this with four dogs in the last 25 years. If you love them, let them go.
I won't let him suffer. That is the exact point I make the call as well. Then I cry. Sorry for your predicament and future loss.
There's a reason I like Dogs better'n people.
When the vet say that, then he thinks it is time.
You'll know, if you haven't already when it is time.
When it comes, don't wait. Be the leader and give him peace.
He'll be waiting for you later, of that I am sure.
I know it is hard. Many of us know the pain. We all share it with you, but only you can bear the pain of the loss of a good friend.
If it's just the hindquarters, have you considered giving him a set of wheels? A doggie wheelchair, so to speak.
But if it's more than that, and you'll likely have some sense of that, it's your last responsibility to your fur-buddy to let him go out easy. Those of us with dogs have done it all too often (I'm tearing up just thinking about it) but we owe it to them. They earned our compassion.
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