Saturday, August 4, 2012

A note to the Jaguar dealer ...

... on Alpharetta Highway: If you are going to send someone out with one of your flash rides, you might want to make sure that there's actually gas - sorry, sorry: petrol - in the tank.  Otherwise he might die blocking the turn lane here I want to, you know, turn.

And an extra pro-tip to the guy who's bringing him some gas - sorry, sorry, petrol:  it's bad form to come up so close to me from behind that you're almost kissing my bumper.  Sure, you're trying to get Mr. Bigshot rolling again, but if you had left ten feet I could have backed up and gone around him rather than being forced to wait.

In future if you could endeavor not to live down to all my worst expectations about Jaguar - insufferable stupid rich dudes and the arrogant toadies who tend to their automobiles that are broken down on the side of the road - I'd be very much appreciative.

Love, Borepatch.

7 comments:

Erin Palette said...

Gasoline, or as the British call it, "a spanner."

knottedprop said...

Erin a spanner refers to either a wrench or a spastic person, which means you win the mean disabled joke of the year. Do you also kick puppies?

Rabbit said...

Since leaving the Ford fold, it might be that Jaguar has gone back to the old ways; you know- 8 years to approve a new "colour" of paint, marginal production quality control, et cetera. Much like its fellow traveler, Rover. One of the locally based national automobile writers drove a new Land Rover off the lot on a week's review test and not only sheared the (automatic) transmission internals within two blocks, it had the indignity to drop the transmission to the pavement.

drjim said...

Just gotta love those British cars!

Anonymous said...

Having grown up in a, shall we say, severely multi-cultural urban area, upon obtaining a driver's license I was educated rather quickly to the necessity of leaving 3/4 of a car length between my front bumper and the rear appendages of the vehicle in front of me when stopping so that I did not become trapped when said front vehicle became motionless for conversational purposes.

A decade or so later the organization which performed as my employer was kind enough to assign me a somewhat colorful vehicle, which, along with other accessories, came with 4 days of what they considered "advanced vehicle operation training." That 3/4 car length thing was the first lesson.

notDilbert said...

It's a Jag..... Probably just neede a refill of Lucas Electical Smoke.

(Comes in handy 2 Litre Tins )

BillM said...

Well at least they didn't have to
"call home" for tech support.

Jaguar is owned by Tata motors.
(snicker) based in India.