Sunday, July 18, 2010

Not in Massachusetts, it's not

Look, I'm down with the People's Republic lightening up on (heck, even lighting up) weed. Not my particular poison - not that it's any of your dang business, thanks for asking - but the Gubmint doesn't have any business messing with you in your own private life.

But this gun is not Massachusetts legal, and so it cannot help you protect yourself from the coming Zombiepocalypse. You'll need to head for the New Hampshire border, but I hear they'll shoot Massachusetts refugees on sight.

So kiss your tail end goodbye, sucker, once the outbreak hits. Oh, and you can thank Mitt Romney for signing that "Assault Weapons" ban that's keeping you from defending yourself from Zeke. Always good to have "real conservatives" covering your back ...

So you may as well get baked before the hordes come for your brains.

Oh dear ...


I write like
H. P. Lovecraft

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!




Click the "Follow this Blog" button now - I am merciful to my followers: they will be devoured by Cthulhu first ...

Bob points us to a pretty fun site: I Write Like. It analyzes your writing, and tells you which famous author had a similar writing style. Perhaps this explains why I haven't been sleeping well lately.

But I messed around with it, trying different types of posts to see what it produced for a result. I don't think it's analyzing style so much as subject matter:

Automatic Pistols, the Burgess Shale, and the evolution of design was what made it say my style was Lovecraftian.

The Canals of Mars the Climate Research Unit caused it to say I wrote like Arthur C. Clark.

The Inherent Contradictions of the (American) Welfare State gave me James Joyce.

Edmund Halley, the Board of Longitude, and Harvard's Veritas
? Jonathan Swift.

So it's fun, but I guess I won't give up my day job. I'd pay cash money, though, to see what one of JayG's road rage rants tags out as ...

UPDATE 18 July 2010 19:37: David shoots, he scores! With perhaps the best blog post title ever, too. And didn't the Mamas and the Papas record a song, "California Fhtagn"?

Boring Comedienne is ignorant of history

Yeah, I know, hold the presses. It seems that some no-name, desperate-for-attention "Comic" called Senator Scott Brown's (R-MA*) daughters "prostitutes." Seems some CNN reporter present on the scene (and on-camera) cracked up at the display of "wit".

Snore.

Look, lefties - you like to think that you're all "edgy" and everything, and "push the boundaries", and like a Transvestite in the Lady's Room you "Go where no man has gone before." Whatev. Just so you know, when you do this all you're doing is putting your ignorance on display.

Want proof? You want real edgy? OK, how about the Hellfire Club? A regular party in man-made caves designed to look like the entrance to the Underworld? Complete with Old Nick hisself as club "President" and "Nuns" (prostitutes) brought in for orgies?

In the Eighteenth Century. You know, when they were still burning witches.

Oh, and the club's founder, when visiting the Czar's court in St. Petersburg, dressed up as the King of Sweden. You know - the guys who were at war with the Russians?**

The club admitted women on an equal footing as men, back two centuries before women were allowed to vote. And Ben Franklin was a guest, more than once.

That's edgy. That's breaking barriers. You? You're just some boring potty mouth who can't get anyone to pay attention to you without dragging someone's family into the mud. Not classy, not interesting.

Boring.

* I just like typing that.

** OK, you didn't know. You slept through history class back at State U.

Lucky you

I have a post I'm working on. The operative words are "working on" - a year ago I would have just clicked "post". Now I'm polishing it. I'm actually feeling a bit "all-growed-up-and-blogging" about this ...

Of course, it's 1600 words, so it needs polishing. Examining each word, to make sure it's the right one ...


Yup, it's the right one.

Saturday, July 17, 2010

This is the blending of the Master Races



That can't be a good thing. What caliber for Goku? What caliber for Hauptmann Goku?

Thanks, Euro-Lefties!

It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.

- Johann Christoph Friedrich von Schiller
Take an elite, convinced by class and birth of their fitness to rule Lesser Men. Let them set themselves the task of joining a continent, formerly mired in blood up to its knees into a New Jerusalem, a counterbalance to the Yankee Cowboy across the Atlantic. Give them the power to tax at will, and to spend that lucre extorted at the point of a gun on Grandiose Projects, intended to raise their own self esteem (and hopefully unite the formerly divisive peoples under their new pie-in-the-sky Utopia). What do you get?

Mini-Europe.
Mini-Europe is a park located in Bruparck at the foot of the Atomium in Brussels, Belgium. Mini-Europe has the reproductions of the most attractive monuments in the European Union on show, at a scale of 1:25. Roughly 80 cities and 350 buildings are represented. The park is renowned for the quality of its models, some of which cost as much as €350,000 to make (the Brussels Grand-Place). The park contains numerous live action models (train, mills, eruption of Mount Vesuvius, Airbus, cable cars, etc. A guide gives the details on all the monuments. At the end of the visit, the “Spirit of Europe” exhibition gives an interactive overview of the European Union in the form of multimedia games. The park is built on an area of 24,000 m². The initial investment was of €10 million in 1989, on its inauguration by Prince Philip of Belgium.
It's better than it sounds, especially when you visit there like this:

Yes, I looked goofy, but you knew that. Yes, I had hair (kinda), but I wore a Younger Man's shoes back then (1998). Yes, I had my family with me on a business trip. I do good work, don't I?

Life doesn't get any better than that. Thanks for all the tax money, European folks!

Schiller was right, at least for me. But then, I'm an old softie about this sort of thing. You knew that, too.

SheDaisy - Come Home Soon

Country Music is about the human experience. It's said that most songs are about something that's happened to you, or to someone you know.

I've traveled quite a lot in my career, and life on the road is no picnic. What I didn't see - or at best only saw darkly, through the glass - was what it was like for my family left at home while I was gone.

It's given me a glimpse - observed only fleetingly - of what it must be like for our Military Families who have loved ones gone for a year. The empty bed at night. The dishwasher run less than normal. The too-neat house.

SheDaisy writes and sings their own songs, frequently with a family theme (not surprising when you consider that the group members are sisters). Their 2004 song Come Home Soon captures the feeling of incompleteness we feel when our family is gone.



Come Home Soon
(Songwriters: Kristyn Osborn, John Shanks)
I put away the groceries
And I take my daily bread
I dream of your arms around me
As I tuck the kids in bed

I don't know what you're doin'
And I don't know where you are
But I look up at that great big sky and I
hope you're wishin' on that same bright star

I....... wonder

I....... pray

And I sleep alone
And I cry alone
And it's so hard livin' here on my own
So please.... Come home soon....
Come home soon....

I know that we're together
Even though we're far apart
And I wear our lucky penny
Around my neck pressed to my heart

(and) I....... wonder

I....... pray

I sleep alone
I cry alone
And it's so hard livin' here on my own
So please.... Come home soon....

I still imagine your touch
It's beautiful missing something that much
But sometimes love needs a fighting chance
So I'll wait my turn until it's our turn to dance

I....... wonder

I....... pray

I sleep alone
I cry alone
Without you this house is not a home
So please.... (Come home soon)....

I walk alone
I try alone
And I'll wait, for I don't want to die alone

So please.... Come home soon....

Come home soon....

Come home soon....
#1 Son and I are doing just fine, and it's good every once and a while to miss the others. But this weekend, take a moment to think on the families of our troops - especially our own Greg Morris and Albert Rasch - who are missing them for a lot longer than a week. The sacrifice they make for us is almost - almost - beyond comprehension, and it's one for which I am inexpressibly grateful.

He got his award the Old Fashioned Way


Earned, baby. This is an outstanding idea, and has my hearty endorsement.

Caution!


Maybe I'll just have some cereal ...

Friday, July 16, 2010

"What a beautiful land you will be for the enemy."

The most important battle you've never heard of took place over six days in August, 636. Arab muslims, united for the first time under the Caliph had seized Iraq from a weakened Sassanid Persia, and then invaded Byzantine Syria.

This was too close for comfort for Emperor Heraclius. It was one thing for these new invaders to harry the Empire's ancient Persian enemies. It was another thing entirely to find them a few day's march from his residence at Antioch. He gathered an enormous army from across his empire - ancient sources are notoriously unreliable when counting the number of troops, but his force numbered no less than 20,000, and may have had twice that. Arab chroniclers put the number at 80,000.

But the very size of the force contained what would be the seeds of its own failure. While the elite Imperial Kataphraktoi (heavy cavalry) were the core of the army, there was no way that even the Empire could afford tens of thousands of them. They fleshed out the rest of the cavalry with auxiliaries from subject kingdoms. The highly mobile light cavalry came from the Christian Arab kingdom of the Ghassanids.

The problem is that the Ghassanids were considered heretics. Adherents to the Monophysite belief (the belief that Jesus had only a divine nature, not a dual divine and human one), they were not fully trusted. Long standing tensions between them and the Imperial government had relations swimming in a poisonous mixture of contempt on one side and grievance on the other.

When you add poor generalship to the Byzantine side (General Vahan fought on ground chosen by his opponent, Khalid ibn al-Walid, the "Sword of God"), the battle went south for the Byzantines. Using interior lines, Khalid shifted his mobile reserve from location to location to thwart his superior adversary. Even so, it was a near thing, and the Battle of Yarmouk is perhaps the longest meeting engagement in ancient history.

But the Arabs were united in purpose, and their opponents were divided among themselves, and on the sixth day the Imperial Army cracked. Unable to make its divisive components support each other, they were essentially defeated in detail and routed. The Empire was exhausted by the expense of fielding the massive force, and couldn't counter the victorious Arab army. Provinces fell like dominoes, and the Emperor was forced to flee by ship to Constantinople. As he boarded, he gazed back at his beloved Syria and lamented:
Farewell, a long farewell to Syria, my fair province. Thou art an infidel's now. Peace be with you, O Syria – what a beautiful land you will be for the enemy.
Palestine, Jerusalem itself, Egypt, and North Africa were gone in a decade, and the Empire faced a slow decline into oblivion.

Mistrust among allies is a sign of impending disaster. We see that distrust - in the Washington Post, no less - surfacing between the Democratic House of Representatives and the White House:

"What they wanted to do is separate themselves from us," Pascrell said Wednesday. He accused the White House of wanting to preemptively pin the blame on lawmakers running poor campaigns should Democrats lose the majority and not on Obama's own sagging approval ratings.

At the Tuesday night meeting with Pelosi, lawmakers groused that the White House was taking them for granted. Pascrell was especially vocal and punctuated his complaints by reading Gibbs's comments word for word in front of the caucus. After he spoke, Pelosi interjected. "I disagree on one point -- I think you were too kind to Mr. Gibbs," she said, according to Democrats familiar with her comments.
You can cut the distrust with a knife. While it's made worse by the poor generalship displayed by the Obama Administration, the distrust for many runs deep. The Administration is filled with the politically Orthodox - hard left, urban coastal machine pols. They despise the axillary troops that gave them the victories of 2009 and early 2010 - the Blue Dog Democrats. They despise them because they are heretics, supporters of anathema like the Second Amendment, strong national security, and (relative) fiscal sanity. They are barbarians from benighted border provinces like North Carolina and Arkansas.

The Blue Dogs know that they're not trusted. They think that they're canon fodder, and that the Imperial Court - Obama, Rahm Emmanuel, and Gibbs - don't respect them. They're probably right.

Right now, the Democratic Party holds a commanding advantage, but they struggle to exploit their weight of numbers because of internal religious wars. At the very moment that their enemy's strength is waxing, they find internal divisions within their ranks hindering a cohesive response. Contempt is met by mistrust, and the hour of the battle draws nigh.

Jabalah ibn al-Aiham was the last king of the Ghassanid Arabs, and commanded their contingent at Yarmouk. Abandoned by the Empire following the disaster, he converted to Islam. At least there, he wasn't despised for being an Arab.

One wonders how many surviving Blue Dog Democrats will consider this course - joining the other party, because their current one doesn't quite accept them. November is still a long time off, but interesting political events won't end with the election; they'll start with it.
Farewell, a long farewell to Carolina, my fair province. Thou art an infidel's now. Peace be with you, O Carolina – what a beautiful land you will be for the enemy.

Strange

I'm getting incoming traffic from the World Socialist Party (US). They're looking at this.

I wouldn't expect that this would be their preferred, err, opiate, but welcome Comrades!

Thursday, July 15, 2010

Ugh

Not feeling well. Actually, not feeling well since yesterday evening.

If y'all don't mind, I think I'm going to crawl into a hole and pull the hole in after me.

Look, it's not like you need another reason not to use it, OK?

It seems that there are some pretty serious security problems with Chatroulette:
Boffins at the University of Colorado at Boulder and McGill University were able to show that a pre-recorded low-quality video of an attractive woman could fool the majority of participants into thinking the feed was live. The approach might be used as a prelude to phishing attacks, for example. The researchers also found it was possible to use an IP-mapping services to get a general location on another participant. A variety of man-in-the middle attacks, where hackers intercept and potentially manipulate the data stream between two participants, might also be possible.
How to put this delicately? Chatroulette has recently added automated penis-recognition technology. I'm guessing that their users aren't overly concerned about privacy.

Blowing smoke rings

This is pretty cool, even if it's pretty close to a lot of trees.



I'd want to try this at the New England blogshoot, but there are so many trees at the sooper sekret range that we'd burn down half the state ...

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Hacking secrets

I don't usually post stuff like this (while you would only use your Powers for good, some people might be tempted by the Dark Side). But this is so good that I'm putting it up anyway.

Annoying ad warning.



Remember, don't abuse this sort of knowlege. Srlsy.

Now George and Billy can argue face to face again

This is possibly the greatest commercial from the greatest series of commercials. And I say that as a Red Sox fan.



R.I.P. George Steinbrenner.

Aux armes, citoyens!



Joyeux Quatorze Juillet aux nos amis francais!

To American readers, please join me in wishing the best to the second oldest formal Republic*. The video has both the French lyrics as well as an English translation, and is well worth listening to. The lyrics describe a time when the forces of Reaction - in the form of the armies of the King of Prussia and the Emperor of Austria - threatened the nascent French Revolution, which was trying to wrest political power from an overly comfortable and entrenched Political Class.

In this American election year, this is worth thinking on. Formez nos bataillons!

* Great Britain, of course, is an older representative government, but has an informal (unwritten) constitution.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

On being a snob and a joyously condescending person

Via Aretae, we find this:
This is how I feel about the American public, and specifically the American voter. I don't want to see them because doing so will serve no purpose other than to make me nervous. I don't want to see their Confederate flag bumper stickers, Palin 2012 t-shirts, Left Behind books, and Insane Clown Posse tattoos. I don't want to hear them regurgitating Glenn Beck monologues, talking about what Jesus told them the other day, or punctuating their speech with "done gonna" and "nuh-uhh." In short, I do not enjoy seeing the level of ignorance that we all understand is pervasive in our society.
Aretae takes him to the woodshed for as satisfying a thrashing as I've seen in a while, but GinAndTacos went and tramped on one of my pet peeves, so I'm fixin' to done gonna reply here.

You see, I used to be an asshat just like GinAndTacos. I was the product of a very intellectual, BoBo upbringing. I knew the right wine to serve, and how to serve it. Watched PBS, and got my thinking points straight from the Washington Post. I knew that I was better than most everybody else, because I was smart. I'd always been told so, and it was true.

In short, I was an idiot, living in a comfortable and well-heeled bubble world, ignorant of everything outside it. Except for Europe and elite opinion from there - well traveled, I put an excess of credence on what they thought of us, on the right side of the Pond. I would have heartily agreed with GinAndTacos:
As much as the good liberal inside all of us wants to sing a Fanfare for the Common Man while lecturing ourselves on the nobility and wisdom of the salt-of-the-earth types who populate this country, seeing them usually just makes me sad. If that means I am a terrible person, I am a terrible person. Toothless hillbillies in pro wrestling t-shirts. A pack of juggalo teenagers. Morbidly obese women in halter tops and jorts. Eighteen year old girls and their three children. Sullen, sunburned yokels slapping their children as other sullen, sunburned yokels look on, understanding the impulse and approving of the act. Baggy-panted black kids getting in fistfights. Twitchy, meth-addled white kids picking at their scabs. Mustachioed policemen harassing the former and ignoring the latter.
Forgive me, I was a jerk. I hadn't (yet) realized what Your Volgi teaches:
Plus, the kids who come in are often times high on themselves and their SAT scores and have increasingly not been exposed to alternative moral systems, like traditional religion, in which they'd hear, "Yeah, you're smart, but so what? Are you good?"
Then I got a job in Atlanta.

We were living in London (London!!!1!). We knew nothing about Atlanta, or the South, other than what we'd seen on PBS or read in The Post, or overheard at the cocktail party. Oh my God, people said, you're moving where?

Of course, Atlanta is a fine place, and filled with fine people, and Lord willing and the creek don't rise we'll skedaddle back there presently. It is delightfully free from Harvard Men who think that they should be able to run your life, by virtue of birth, or class, or degree. But that's not my point.

Aretae is surprisingly gentile in the ass whooping he unleashes, which strangely makes it even more of a thrashing:
I decided consciously that the connectors between me and people were bigger than the separators. And I started acting it. I've lived in small, rich, liberal towns in California. I've lived in Houston, and Austin and Chicago. I've lived in Moscow, Russia, and in Brussels, Belgium. I've lived in poor suburbs, and poor neighborhoods, and I've lived in rich-ish neighborhoods. And when I was traveling for work, I've lived in 100% black neighborhoods, 90% hispanic neighborhoods, and SWPL neighborhoods. And I've had friendly neighbors everywhere.
Amen, brother. And so in the interest of the Fellowship of Humanity, let me extend the hand of friendship to GinAndTaco. It's unlikely that you're as big a jerk as I was. Take a look around, and listen to people who are not like you. It's intellectually stimulating, it puts you out of your comfort zone - which is really the only place that we grow. If you agree that the first principle of a true intellectual is to challenge your own beliefs, this is the fastest way to that growth.

And listen to some Country Music, for crying out loud. There's more to it than you may think, which is just another way of saying the same thing.

Join us, as I propose a toast:
To my youth. God save me from a relapse.
You're welcome.

I did not see that coming


I feel a great disturbance in the Force ...


Yeah, OK then.

Antique Carbon Footprint

I feel like I'm getting my True Blue Sam on, but this is so packed with Steampunk retro awesome that it's in danger of collapsing into a Black Hole of Steampunk retro awesome:



I love the guy on the PA system. I have to respect the British version of Redneck, filled with obscure Anorak historical trivia. My version of redneck is getting lost in the ZOMG-that's-so-cool!

Oh yeah, they also have these decidedly non-Steampunk newfangled contraptions:


Via Theo Spark.