tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post1466484735690852029..comments2024-03-28T16:31:54.494-04:00Comments on Borepatch: Laws of the UniverseBorepatchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/05029434172945099693noreply@blogger.comBlogger9125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-38130460517740917772015-02-12T10:52:30.334-05:002015-02-12T10:52:30.334-05:00Bonneau's Law: The (human) world is 90% bullsh...Bonneau's Law: The (human) world is 90% bullshit.Paul Bonneauhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15279129269584372919noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-48423373262169325072015-02-09T15:32:11.507-05:002015-02-09T15:32:11.507-05:00Regarding #5, my own experiences say the holdups m...<br /><br />Regarding #5, my own experiences say the holdups most often happen with women in their 20's - usually with one baby in tow. Because as the cashier is ringing up the purchases the cell phone conversation in concert with the food stamp/EBT shuffle begins. This can last for hours.<br /><br />In can become really complex if the woman's baby-daddy is attempting to buy booze and cigarettes in the '20 items or less' express checkout line at the same time.Arthurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09289639279717534292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-79358497653721310082015-02-06T20:36:43.715-05:002015-02-06T20:36:43.715-05:00Regarding Rule #5: select the line with the least ...Regarding Rule #5: select the line with the least number of middle-aged women. They will either have trouble finding their credit card, insist on finding the exact change in their 25-pounds-of-junk-inside purse, or chat with the cashier (double whammy if the cashier is also a middle-aged woman). Yes, I realize this will cause me no end of trouble, but years of observation has shown a distinct correlation (to the 95% confidence level, lol). Oh, this applies to any elderly person in the self-checkout line. BTW, I am over 60, FWIW.Chrishttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08015544320906146949noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-75028397605339837272015-02-06T17:50:54.450-05:002015-02-06T17:50:54.450-05:00"Law of the Result - When you try to prove to..."Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!!"<br /><br />This has a corollary called the "Laying on of Hands" stating that one sufficiently versed in the operation of a machine can fix said machine simply by demonstrating its use.<br /><br />I've observed the corollary functioning on everything for a $20 Toaster to a $200,000 In-Circuit Tester.Arthurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09289639279717534292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-33135872805860364482015-02-06T17:41:01.698-05:002015-02-06T17:41:01.698-05:002. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, wh...2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe.<br /><br /><br />This denies the possibility of alternate universes. It is obviously incorrect. :P<br /><br />Anyone who wants to prove me wrong can find my #$%$#% <a href="http://www.midwayusa.com/product/176636/sig-sauer-magazine-catch-spring-sig-sauer-p225-p226-p228-p229-p239-sig-sauer-sp2009-sp2340" rel="nofollow">spring</a> all by themselves.Arthurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09289639279717534292noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-11177951949434346642015-02-06T11:58:50.531-05:002015-02-06T11:58:50.531-05:00Fudd's Law: You can't fall off the floor.
...Fudd's Law: You can't fall off the floor.<br /><br />Finagle's Theorem: It works better if you plug it in.<br /><br />Burt's Question: What happens when you push this butEaglehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14471264704254326723noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-33580765244473621082015-02-06T10:02:31.362-05:002015-02-06T10:02:31.362-05:00Some laws of forestry:
1. After being engaged in...Some laws of forestry:<br /><br />1. After being engaged in a few hours of poison ivy control and far from any restroom, you'll need one.<br /><br />2. The likelihood of a tree falling the wrong way when cut is directly proportional to the proximity of valuable things like cars, sheds, and houses.<br /><br />3. Ice thick enough to support heavy logging machinery on a very cold steam will likewise not be strong enough to support a human foot.<br /><br />4. The best bug repellant in the world won't work on the particular species of biting insect that is in your area today.<br /><br />5. If you haven't had the pleasure of stepping on a ground hornet's nest yet, you will soon.<br /><br />6. The "dead spot" in your radio coverage area will be the precise spot that you get injured or your vehicle stuck.<br /><br />7. Right before the once-creeping fire flares up, the hose will blow or the pump will either flood or run out of gas.<br /><br />Oh, there's more...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15060447410364881536noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-70090182858690034632015-02-06T09:03:19.364-05:002015-02-06T09:03:19.364-05:00There used to be an old one that was passed around...There used to be an old one that was passed around by the Army:<br /><br />Murphy's Laws of Land Warfare:<br /><br />1. Never share a position with somebody braver than you.<br />2. Tracers work both ways.<br />3. Hand grenade fuses are always longer or shorter at the worst time.<br /><br />Bunch of others that I can't remember. but it is a hilarious and thought provoking meme.Mike43https://www.blogger.com/profile/02755662933281886733noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6322916946732811685.post-89975150537492490172015-02-06T08:26:42.685-05:002015-02-06T08:26:42.685-05:00Most of these are immutable laws of the universe, ...Most of these are immutable laws of the universe, but #6 has been solved. US Patent 4,616,110.ASM826https://www.blogger.com/profile/04017388670319590449noreply@blogger.com