"Sergeant Major, First Sergeant, if you would like to return in the morning or return with authorization from the site commander, I would be more than happy to let you pass, but you're not on my list. If you're not on the list you can't come in. Plain and simple, I've got my orders and I ain't violating them, because I don't know you." As soon as my hand touched my pistol Dan radioed me, "Spoon what's the word? Who are these guys?" I tucked the clipboard under my left arm and fumbled with the mic, never taking my hand off the pistol.Oooh rah, soldier! What's astonishing about this story is that a couple months later, some other Sergeant tried to run him down with a HMMWV, and got held at gunpoint for his trouble:
"DeGarr, ECP, I have a situation here. I got a Sergeant Major and a First Sergeant, not on the list, say they want to come in. Over." Sergeant DeGarr was our squad leader and in the time honored military tradition I was attempting to shovel the responsibility of this fiasco on to him. Tallman and Shorty could hear my radio conversation and they glared at me while I waited for a response.
"ECP, DeGarr. No list, no access. Tell them to talk to the CO. Over."
"I already told them that, they aren...shit!" They had heard DeGarr's response and apparently didn't like it. The Sergeant Major had mounted the fence and was clearly attempting to climb over it. The gate was the one section that didn't have concertina at the top as it would have interfered with operation of the gate. I guess the Sergeant Major believed he could scale the fence and tell me in person how much he didn't like our policies.
In one swift, long practiced motion I dropped my clipboard, and pulled the loaded magazine from my left cargo pocket while pulling the pistol from its holster. I stripped the asinine tape from the magazine and slammed it up the well, chambering the first round before Tallman had reached the top of the fence. Shorty hit the dirt and my radio burst into sound. "ECP! DeGarr! Status report!"
"DeGarr, Overwatch. One of 'ems trying to climb the fence. You better get your ass down here Sergeant, I think Spoon's gonna shoot one of them!"
He either hadn't heard the story about Sergeant Major Fredricks, or didn't care. Either way, he was pushing the same buttons. "I'm a fucking Sergeant, now open that fucking gate Specialist!"OOOH RAH, Soldier!
The clipboard was down and the first round was chambered before Sergeant Tannin could blink. I lined up the posts with his eyebrow and told him how it was as I walked toward the drivers door. "Turn off the fucking engine and get your ass out of the vehicle!" His eyes were wide and his lips were twitching like he wanted to talk but couldn't (why do they always do that?), but he turned off the engine and opened his door as I heard my radio squawk.
"DeGarr, Overwatch. I think Spoon's gonna shoot somebody again."
Note to visitors to Camp Borepatch: if your name is not on the Access List, please have patience as your authorization goes through channels. Do not, repeat do not attempt to run down the guard with your POV. Srlsy.
* Man, I wonder if the installers have even worked with these before. They're not bi-directional. Do I have to do everything?
"...the concertina wire and claymores* should be installed..."
ReplyDelete(Ahem) "Garden gnomes." Advertising the presence of antipersonnel munitions is uncultured.
Oh, and the concertina wire is a trellis for the morning glories.
Dave, heh.
ReplyDeleteBut I like my neighbors, so I like the ambiance of exposed claymores. As a deterrent.
The procedure at MBtGE private retreat property is to approach the gate on foot from 600 yards out, rifle slung, and in each had held high two large cans of coffee. Folgers is ok, but better is better. The whole time you slowly approach the entrance it is good to keep thinking in your head "and there is plenty more coffee where this came from if you let me in."
ReplyDeleteAnd hell, he KNOWS me, and I have to take such precautions.
He won't take a shot until 500 yards out, and if he sees coffee... That buys a parley. Usually.
ReplyDeleteHe's good at prepping, but he often forgets to lay in supplies of coffee. THAT's my edge.
ReplyDeleteFor example, a soldier who doesn't let a Sergeant Major scale his fence for a "surprise inspection," instead holding him at gunpoint because they're not on the Access List:
ReplyDeleteGood man. Good story. I hope he went far.
LOL, yep there are rules and then there are RULES! If it'd been a Marine, he probably WOULD have shot the Sgt...
ReplyDeleteGood fences make good neighbors. You. Will. Have. Great. Neighbors.
ReplyDeleteClipboards? Guards should have the list memorized, with faces.
ReplyDeleteFirearm that is not locked and loaded? Seriously?
A gate that can be climbed? Really?
One guard? No support from a sniper nest?
No fucking coffee?
Sigh.
@JB Miller: If you go back to the linked story, you'll find this passage in it: " To prevent any accidental wounding, harming or frightening of alleged hostile forces we were required to store our ammunition magazines in a buttoned pocket (Not our ammo pouches!) with a piece of tape securing the top cartridge. I do not have the words to describe how frustrating this was, simply thinking about it now, almost ten years later, sets my teeth to grinding in tempered anger.
ReplyDeleteAlso, JB: "One guard? No support from a sniper nest?"
ReplyDeleteThe story also mentions that the chap at callsign "Overwatch" was in a nearby observation tower armed with an M249.
Oh, I didn't drill back through the links.
ReplyDeleteIf you really are doing a survival retreat do NOT use standard military protocol. The army has the concept of acceptable losses. No loss is acceptable in a retreat scenario.
Detour, detect, delay, deceive, demorialize, destroy...
1). You can never have too many claymores.
ReplyDelete2). Criteria for the next move to a rural area is a cleared 800 meter KZ in all directions, as stipulated by SWMBO. I've trained her well.
3). If you can be observed at the perimeter or gate, you can be hit at the point at which you stand. You were under observation well before you made it to said point.