Why will the British National Health Service not put a piano in a hospital?

Because they can't even keep the patients clean:

A grandmother died in a filthy and depressing NHS ward which 'removed her rights to dignity', a coroner ruled yesterday.

Margot Kennedy, 78, was not properly washed for six weeks before her death.

Nurses at Leicester General Hospital left her in sheets covered with faeces and doctors failed to tackle her refusal to eat as she rapidly lost weight, it was claimed.

It is depressing how often you read about basic sanitation failings in the NHS. Maybe the employees were too busy thieving:

The family of a pensioner whose arm was severed in a car crash believe her wedding rings were stolen from the limb after she was rushed to hospital.

Great-grandmother Doris Smith, 65, suffered horrific injuries when her husband crashed into another car while driving on a country road.

Mrs Smith was airlifted to Frenchay Hospital in Bristol where her left arm was amputated.

But by the time it was incinerated less than 24 hours later, her three rings - including the wedding and engagement rings she had worn for 48 years - had vanished from the left hand.

Hey, they have to close the budget gap somehow.

Of course, things here would never be like that. I mean, c'mon - it's Britain, for crying out loud. It's not like it was some place civilized.

Hat tip: The Drawn Cutlass.